We are all at a loss when it comes to knowing how we should behave around our exes. The situation can be trickier when that ex happens to get a job in the same company as you. The emotional and psychological effects of breaking up with that person will be awakened by the daily contact you have with the ex. That could have a negative impact on your performance if you are not careful enough. You definitely wouldn’t want your personal issues to spill over to your profession and interfere with your productivity. There are certain measures that you are supposed to put in place to better cope with the situation. These include:
Focus on your work
You should keep in mind the fact that your duty at the workplace is to work and nothing else. Thus, make sure that you are as professional as possible and do not allow your mind to stray from your work responsibilities. You should use your work as a distraction to avoid thinking about your ex and the pain he caused you. You should ensure that you finish your projects on time and carry out other errands with the same efficiency like you did before your ex came to work at you company.
Be polite to your ex
Treat your ex with utmost respect like you would treat any other colleague at the workplace. No matter how much he or she hurt you, do not carry the grudges to work and try to humiliate him or her. The two of you should behave as maturely as possible. Whatever happened between the two of you should not affect your work lives. Being courteous to the ex will not cost you much after all and it could even help to rebuild your relationship in case you are still attracted to each other.
Avoid gossiping about your ex to co-workers
We are all aware of how office gossip can have far reaching effects such as destroying relationships. The details of your past relationship with you ex should never be a subject of the office grapevine. You certainly do not want to have colleagues whispering behind your back while discussing your failed relationship with the ex. The gossip might appear harmless at first but it can amount to psychological torture with time. Your performance at work will eventually suffer if you are stressed up. The bottom line is to separate your personal life with your professional life and ensure that you do not blurt out your issues with your ex to your colleagues. Learn to control your emotions in order to execute this effectively.
Talk to your ex privately
In case you are in good talking terms with your ex and he or she is open to a conversation with you, you should go ahead and schedule one. Take that opportunity to discuss any unresolved issues you might have had in the past and define how you are going to handle your current working situation.
Make sure that the information does not reach your boss
The news about the new worker should not, by any chance, reach the boss’ ears, especially if you are working in a small company where you share the same building with the employer. The boss is likely to think that you will perform poorly and pick on you, the more reason why you should not reveal to anyone that you two were dating before.
These five tips should help you to know how you are going to behave when your ex suddenly shows up the workplace and becomes your fellow employee. The tips will enable you to sail through the years of working together after the initial shock has dissipated. However, if you are still in love with your former lover, you should approach the issue differently. Take the situation as an opportunity to mend the relationship and get back your man or woman. Here are some tips of what you should do in order to get your ex back:
Ask them whether they are interested
You should inquire from your ex if he or she will be interested in getting back together with you. If your ex says that he or she is interested in rebuilding the relationship, then you can plan to go out and discuss where the two of you stand. In case he says otherwise, you should not give up, you never know, with time, that same person might change his mind and look for you again. When contacting your ex, make sure that you do not do it frequently by bombarding him with text messages and phone calls. That habit is likely to drive your ex away from you and make him feel uncomfortable.
Look after yourself
Remember to take care of your looks and try to look as attractive as possible. Always dress well when you are going to work. Your ex is likely to remember what got him attracted to you in the first place. However, do not over do it and end up appearing too desperate for his attention.
Change your behaviour
Evaluate what had led to the break up and be honest when analyzing the situation. Determine your role in the breakup and see what character traits you will need to change. Try to remember what your ex might have complained about your conduct and do the necessary adjustments. Since you are spending most of the day in the same workplace, he is likely to notice your changed behavior and feel attracted to you again.
Apologize for your mistakes
If you really want your ex back, you will have to swallow your pride and take responsibility for the breakup. You should apologize sincerely for any wrong doing you might have done to your ex and for anything you did to annoy him. Your never know, that could be the only thing your ex could have been waiting for. Make the first move and you could win him back all over again.
Create time to be with him
Be available for him when he wants to go out with you. Spend as much time with him as possible depending on your schedules. That will allow you to solve your issues and reestablish your relationship. Good Luck.